It was a sunny afternoon somewhere in the Hetalia universe of universes. All was calm, as you were taking a siesta.
Your bestie swung the door to your room and was grinning. The door hit the wall so hard and made such a loud noise that you fell off of your bed, cursing the entire way down.
"D-Damned American." You muttered under your breath.
"Hey Al!" You popped your head up to see his stupid grinning face.
"Dude! I have like, the coolest idea ever!"
"We're gonna go pay Ivan to invade Gilbert's vital regions?!" You jumped up with excitement.
"Wh-What? No! Hey, that's a good idea... Er, what I meant was to go to MacLarens tonight!" Alfred declared.
"MacLarens? You mean the bar?" You said, bummed a little.
"Yeah man! We can go take some shots, I meet hot chicks, you be my wingman, the good stuff dude!"
"What? How come I can't meet hot guys?"
"Because, drunk dudes are dangerous. You've seen Artie!"
That's when it hit you:
"Good point...Wait! Let's TAKE Iggy with us!"
"What the hell _______?! You know how crazy he gets when--"
Alfred grinned darkly.
"You're right! Let's take a video camera too!"
<Time skip powers go~!>
The three of you were at the bar, chilling in a booth.
"BRB, bestie!" Alfred grinned, grabbing Arthur to the bathroom.
"WHAT THE BLOODY HELL LET GO OF ME YA GIT!!!!" Arthur screamed.
While they were gone, you went to the front and sat in one of the stools.
"Hey ______! Haven't seen you in forever! How've ya been?" Carl the bartender said.
"I know right? Sheesh! I need to come here more often."
"Where's Alfred and that British guy?"
"They're taking a piss. Can I have the usual?" You asked.
"Haha, still ain't ready to take on alcohol, eh? Sure, one large sweet tea."
Carl went to the back, and returned with a giant beer mug filled with ice and sweet tea. He also had some vodka.
"For your friends."
"Thanks bro!" You said, taking out some money, and pushing it to Carl.
You grabbed the drinks and returned to your booth, kicking your feet up on the table.
A blond man in a suit came up to you. He didn't look sober. You rolled your eyes, taking a swig of your "beer".
"Hey babe, I'm an astronaut, and I'm going to Mars tomorrow.
Oh hey! He was one of those suit womanizer guys! Maybe you could go mess with him for a bit.
"OMG you're an astronaut?! How cool! Do you destroy asteroids and stuff?"
"More asteroids and how many times I've done it with other girls!"
He has the yips* too! Even Alfred could do better than this guy. Heck! Arthur can do better if he had the right wingman.
"How 'bout I buy you some drinks? And then you--"
"Kick your balls so hard that you can't have kids? Gladly."
"N-Never mind...." His voice trailed off and started screaming at someone.
"TED! I THOUGHT YOU SAID THE CHICK WAS DRUNK!!"
Yeah...that guy was drunk. You laughed at the guy's failure.
"Oh, thank you ______ for getting the drinks!" Arthur said. The two came back from the "bathroom". You could see two girls staring at them and smiling.
Oh god, how gross.
<About an hour later>
This was hilarious. Arthur was already drunk after one glass of vodka.
Because he was so drunk, Iggy ripped off his shirt, leaving the collar and a bow tie behind. He also went pantsless, so he wore some type of super short skirt.....
You started recording what he was doing, and sipped your "beer".
Iggy jumped up on the table started humping the thin air and started singing:
"NEV'R GOIN' TO GIVE YOU UP, NEV'R GOIN' LET YOU DOWN!"
You and Alfred burst out laughing.
"TED, HEY TED C'MERE." Alfred screamed at "Ted".
So Alfred was drunk too. Party hard!
Iggy grabbed his....private, (yeah that's the word) and-- oh god you couldn't explain what was happening, but it was the sexiest thing in the world, and everyone was staring.
"HEY! DRINKS ON ME YOU BLOODY WANKERS!" Arthur screamed, and everyone at the bar cheered.
"Wh-Why won't the light SHUT UP!" Arthur mumbled under his blanket.
"Last night was AMAZING." You exclaimed.
"Last night? I can't even remember last night!" Alfred whined.
Aw! They were going through a hangover! You explained how him and Arthur "did it" in the bathroom with some chicks before they could start drinking. Then you showed Alfred the video while Arthur was complaining.
And for the rest of the day, you and Alfred posted gossip videos (for example, "Justin Beiber Hit By A Car?! One Direction= Five Pedo's using Fake Masks?!) on YouTube, that were actually Arthur humping and screaming "Flying Mint Bunny".
You called it: Iggyrolled.
THE END OF THE STUPID STORY~!